Poker's Secret Edge: Mastering Presence and Unpredictability

11 Apr 2025

Intermediate

This material is for medium-skilled players

We’re starting a brand-new series today called «The Happy Crusher». Why that name? Because there’s one thing I know pretty much out there: it’s not just helping you play at higher and higher levels — it’s helping you get there in a way that feels better inside. So that your own natural style starts to come out. So that you become the version of you that’s unlike anybody else — as a poker player, and just as a person. I’ve already done this with tons of clients. Now I want to start sharing more of the things I’m learning during my poker life — right here with you! So you can really start pushing the envelope of what’s possible.

Think about it: Most poker players aren’t very dangerous. They’re not scary to play against. Why? Because everyone’s doing the same stuff.

• Study the solver.
• Talk hands with friends.
• Get feedback from a poker coach.
• Post hands, read responses.
• Rinse and repeat.

It’s all useful — but it also makes you just like everyone else. And if you don’t have anything beyond that, anything special inside you, then you're average. And nobody’s afraid of average.

Sure, you might catch a hot streak here or there, win a tournament or two. But it’s never going to be deeply satisfying the way it could be if you were playing a style that really suits you — a style that puts others on edge:

• Where you are the one people are thinking about.
• Where you are the problem they have to solve at the table.

That’s what I want for all of you. Because you need that extra edge, and extra element, that makes sure it’s always possible for you to come out ahead. Even when you’re up against players who are:

• More experienced.
• More accomplished.
• More knowledgeable.

If you can bring a wave of unpredictability — and it’s coming from a place of confidence. That’s going to take you really far. Next up, I’m going to talk about a couple of concepts I think are badly misunderstood in poker.

Let’s talk about two concepts that often get mixed up in poker—and in life, really:

• I want to avoid making mistakes.
• I want to make great decisions.

They sound similar, like two sides of the same coin. But they come from very different places. You hear it all the time: «I hate making mistakes. I hate it more than anything». But let’s pause and ask:
What actually is a mistake?

I’ve been asking this question a lot on coaching calls lately. And usually, people say something like: «I was in a spot, I made a decision, and then afterwards I realized I didn’t like that decision». Okay, but almost always, what’s really going on is this:

Now, after the hand is over, after the cards are revealed, now you know more. So of course, you’d make a different choice if you could go back. How many things, on or off the felt, would we all do differently if we had hindsight?

So if you go around labeling those moments as mistakes, you’re just setting yourself up to constantly beat yourself up:

• I messed up.
• I should’ve done better.
• If I had been more focused, I would've made a better choice.

No. That’s not true. None of that is true. What is true is:

• This was the situation.
• This is what you did.
• This was the result.
• And this is how you feel.

And it’s that last part, how you feel, that most people don’t have the skill to sit with. When you can’t sit with that feeling, your mind tries to shortcut it. It slaps a label on it: mistake or good play.
Black or white. Right or wrong. 

But neither label is helpful. Because once you start labeling, you’re no longer present with the truth. And you’re not connected to what actually happened. You’re caught up in judgment, not reflection.

So if you really look at it this way: there’s no such thing as a mistake. Not in the way we usually think of it. It’s not some cheesy «we learn from every mistake» kind of idea. I mean literally — the concept of a mistake doesn’t hold up.

And even when people say: «Yeah, but I did know better. I’ve studied that spot. I’ve seen it before». Okay. But then the real question becomes: «Why couldn’t you access it at the moment?». That’s where the real work is.

If you couldn’t see it at the moment, it’s not a “mistake”. If you were in an emotional state, or if your mind just couldn’t identify the key piece of information in that hand, then you didn’t actually know it at that moment. And if you didn’t know it, then it wasn’t a mistake.

A mistake, by definition, would mean that you clearly knew the correct thing to do and actively chose to do the opposite. Sure, maybe if you deliberately decided, «I know this is wrong, but I’m doing it anyway», just to self-sabotage or whatever — okay, maybe that’s a mistake. But even then… you still got what you were aiming for. So is it even a mistake? Or just self-fulfilling behavior? What I really need you to understand is this:

The pain you feel after losing a hand, getting shown a bluff, getting shown the nuts… that’s real. But what’s even more painful is what we do to ourselves in our heads:

• I made a mistake.
• I suck.
• I have to study this hand obsessively.
• I can’t believe I did that.

That self-talk, that fixation, is way more destructive than the original moment. It costs more. It hurts more. It lasts longer. So how do you free yourself? Start with the fact that mistakes don’t exist. That’s the first shift. And it ties directly into the second concept: Making great decisions. People may say next:

• I just want to make great decisions.
• I want to avoid mistakes and do it right.

But that also doesn’t exist. Not in the way people think it does. I was talking to someone on a group call recently. He said: «I feel so much pressure in big moments because I have to make the right decision». I stopped him immediately. Why? Just because there is no right decision. There just isn’t!

Either you don’t have the knowledge — or you’re in an emotional state where you can’t access it. Either way, the “right answer” doesn’t exist for you at that moment.

And so, the real skill, the real path, is in hunting the truth. That’s how you become what I call a “happy crusher” — someone who performs well and stays emotionally grounded. You hunt the truth and you sit with whatever emotions come with it.

Let’s look at one classic spot. Someone goes all-in. You’re facing a decision — call or fold. Almost always, the truth is either:

• I have no idea what to do.
• I kind of want to call… and I kind of want to fold.

That second one? That’s huge. Most people don’t even know that’s a valid truth. But if it’s true, it’s true. Because think about it: if it were 100% clear what you wanted to do, you wouldn’t be tanking. You’d just act. No hesitation. You’d snap-call or snap-fold.

So what’s really happening most of the time? You want both things: 1— You want to call. 2 — You want to fold. That’s the truth. And if we all started recognizing that truth more often, we could eliminate like 80% of tanking in poker.

If everyone could just get on board with this idea: «I want to call and I want to fold». That’s it. That’s the real feeling. We're spending all this time trying to figure out which option we want, when the truth is… we want both. So skip all the mental gymnastics. Just start here: «I want both».

Now you're not stuck trying to figure out which one is right, because neither is. Both are. There is no “right” decision. That’s the truth. You don’t have to force a choice. And once you really understand that, you can start to approach high-pressure, uncertain spots in a whole new way.

Think about elite performers — athletes, musicians, whoever. They all say the same thing: «Let the game come to you». You don’t force it. You don’t tense up and try to make it happen. But that’s exactly what poker players do all the time in big spots:

• I’ve got to figure it out.
• I’ve got to get it right.

No — you don’t. That’s not how you get good results. You get them by staying present, by allowing the game to come to you. Letting the game come to you means this:

• Sitting in that discomfort.
• Acknowledging that you have no idea what you’re going to do.
• Admitting that you want both options.
• And being okay with that feeling.
• You don’t need to know what you’re going to do before you do it.

I know it sounds crazy. But when I look back at the best hands I’ve ever played — and there were a lot — I wasn’t trying to be a genius. I was just present. I wasn’t planning anything. It just happened. I did something, and it came from that moment. That’s letting the game come to you.

Most people do the opposite:

• Think, think, think.
• Try to figure it out.
• Try to prove it’s the “right” play.

But if it were that clear, you would have known your decision immediately. You didn't. You want both. So just sit with that. Once you start from that place, something will happen. You don’t have to make a decision in the traditional sense. And if there’s no right decision, and no actual need to decide... then there are no mistakes either.

That’s how you free yourself:

• Free from the fear of messing up.
• Free from the pressure to be right.
• Free from the need to find the one correct answer.

And that kind of freedom? That’s where your best poker happens.

You free yourself from the pressure, from the expectation. And once you do that — now you're dangerous. Because now, you're someone who’s capable of anything.

That unpredictability? It's a powerful weapon. It gives you an edge, especially when you’re facing strong opponents — players whose games you really respect. You need something extra when you're going up against those kinds of players.

So this is your weapon: «I do this better than you». It doesn’t mean you’ll crush them over thousands of hands. But in this hand, in this spot, you can win. And sometimes, that’s all you need. But if you're constantly trying to figure it out (calculating, analyzing, etc.) stuck in your head— you miss things. You miss the subtle clues your opponent gives you. You’re too busy replaying hands, thinking:

• What did he do before?
• What does this bet mean?

That kind of thinking takes you away from the present moment. And if you're not fully present, you can’t let the insights come to you. Again: let the game come to you. It all comes back to a core skill:

Because there is a fine line:

• On one side, you're flowing. You feel good. You’re playing on another level.
• On the other, you're punting. You're spazzing. You're doing wild, reckless stuff.

A lot of players say they’re trusting their instincts… but they’re not. They’re just overwhelmed. They’re in their heads. And when the emotions hit, they want out. So they just react:

• I call (Because they can’t stand the tension).
• I fold (Because they’re afraid of being wrong).

But these aren’t plays. These are escapes. These are reactions to discomfort, not decisions. And that’s the difference. You’ve got to develop the ability to sit with it: «Whatever I’m feeling, I’m here for it».

You’re not trying to get away from the feeling. You’re not in a rush to do something. You’re steady. You can handle it. You still feel like yourself. You still move at your own pace. You still think clearly.

You're not forcing it. You're not grabbing for answers. The thoughts just come. And that is just the place where the brilliance lies. That’s the kind of player nobody wants to face. There are a lot of players out there who, on the surface, don’t look like they know much. But they’re winning. Why? Because they have this skill.

They stay in the moment. They let the game come to them. They play with presence, with calm, with freedom. And when you can do that — you become a whole different kind of threat at the table.

They can sit in the discomfort of not knowing. They’re free of the pressure — free of the expectation to make perfect decisions or avoid mistakes. Somehow, somewhere, they became that way. And you can too.

But it starts with anchoring yourself in presence — the ability to accept every feeling as it comes, while still staying grounded in who you are. If you can do that, you’re going to love this game. Because very few people actually play like that.

There’s a reason you can access the thoughts, mindsets, and strategies of the best players in the world for just a few bucks. But nobody gets the same results. Why? Because strategy alone isn’t enough:

• They can give you the process.
• They can tell you what they’d do in your spot.

But every spot is different. And while you're stuck chasing the last hand, they’re already playing the next one. That’s how you make the leap. And honestly? It’s all pretty average now — because almost everyone knows the same technical stuff.

That’s what I see clearly now, after years away from the grind of being a full-time player. I wish I had understood this back then. But it wasn’t a mistake — I just didn’t know. Now you do. And you can use that to build something new, something different. Something way more fulfilling for you in this game. And I really hope you do.

If you’ve got questions about this, drop them in the comments. Got a topic you want me to cover in this series? Let us know — comments, messages, whatever works. But at the end of a day ask yourself:

• Are you going to be the player who needs to figure everything out?
• Or the one who’s ready to let it happen?

That’s the difference between average… and dangerous. It’s your choice. I’ll keep talking about these kinds of things in this series. But I hope you like it. Because I believe in this. Deeply. And this approach, this mindset, has made millions and millions of dollars for my people. So if you’ve got questions, reach out. Otherwise, I’ll see you in the next one. Have a great weekend everybody!